What the fucking hell could you be thinking in assuming it’s a good fucking idea to ordain a fucking ADMITTED AND CONVICTED CHILD MOLESTER as a pastor on the razor-thin “promise” that he won’t work with kids? What the hell kind of message are you sending to the victim? Yes, you too can ass rape a 10 year old against his will, permanently scarring him and creating serious psychological problems (Have you seen an episode of Celebrity Rehab, or Intervention, or Obsessed, or Listened to Loveline? Hell, have you ever seen Criminal Minds, CSI or Law & Order?) and then when you carry a sad face for a few years you too can become a pastor, a PERSON OF AUTHORITY OVER CHILDREN.
The reason why the Catholic Molestation issue is such a big deal is because these people blindly trust people in the position of pastors, priests or other church officials. Like we trust cops, and we trust principals and doctors. Foolish or not these are the people we turn to when we need help. We should not go into the hospital for a major surgery and have to wonder if our doctor is going to be able to fix us. We should not worry if our kids are going to be safe at their schools. We should not be afraid that when we call the police when we have discovered our car or home broken into that the cops will pick up a few things from our property for them selves, or assault us.
We should KNOW these things.
Yet you douches had the genius idea to INVITE ONE OF THE WORSE KINDS OF VICTIMIZERS INTO A POSITION OF AUTHORITY. It’s all fine and great that this man “thinks” he is on a good path now and “thinks” he has the support to not reoffend. But almost all pedophiles and molesters are MULTIPLE offenders.
Furthermore this man’s recovery is NOTHING compared to the well being of the children around him.
As an abuse survivor myself, let me tell you this, This man, this rapist, this offender served his ten years, got out and moved on with his life. But this child who was physically and emotionally violated, who had his sense of normalcy and well-being shattered, HE WILL NEVER HEAL. He might learn to function, and not to harm others, or himself BUT HE WILL NEVER HEAL.
And as if coming out to face his abuser wasn’t enough (many, many people never do. I have had 40-50 year olds admit to me their abuse and that they had never told anyone else) you are telling him his struggle, his pain, his life doesn’t matter!
What kind of fucking douche bags are you?
I’m not saying this man cannot be in your church. I’m not saying he cannot rebuild his life, or volunteer. I’m saying DO NOT PUT HIM IN AN AUTHORITY POSITION, like say, oh, AS A PASTOR.
People like you are why I quit Christianity. I am so fucking tired of children’s lives, their well being, being tossed aside for the sake of adults. This stupid fucking “Adults are always right and should be respected and put above children” bullshit has left me with years of messed up, mixed up feelings. It’s let others to drugs, sex addiction, depression and worse.
Hey, City of Refuge Worship Center, how about instead of perpetuating the MO that’s led to a populace of violent, drug-addled, fearful, hateful, scarred people, how about standing up and saying “We’re not going to be that asshole”?
And to the Louisville Populous, again from experience:
DO NOT TAKE THE CHANCE. Do not let YOUR child be the one to test whether a child molester is indeed “reformed” or not. Do not blindly trust, against your gut, and against your head.
I think we should focus at least some on Deacon Pickerell, who quit (probably without another ministry lined up, I’m guessing) when this situation presented itself.
When push comes to shove, the only possessions we have in this life are our actions. The world and its people are often wrong. Horrendously, viciously, violently, sickeningly wrong. But thank God for people like Deacon Pickerell, who are willing to not only leave a sick situation but also talk to the media about it.
Absolutely. I am NOT saying this man cannot be a part of the church, he just shouldn’t be in a position of power in the church and that’s what a pastor is.
Such language! And using fabricated scripted FICTIONAL television shows as the basis for your expert knowledge? REALLY? We at the City of Refuge are FULLY AWARE of Mark’s past, and now the world is! So what kind of idiot do you think would leave him alone with children. As a matter of fact, he has EXPRESSLY BEGGED that we NOT leave him alone with children. So it’s vulgar, irresponsible people like you who we have to worry about that would clearly be neglectful enough to leave your child alone with someone whose history you don’t know cover to cover! There is NO NEED to leave your child alone with ANYONE! These are things you teach your child from a VERY early age! It’s a shame so many parents fail at that, and their children resultingly fall prey to this illness!
Ma’am, my expert knowledge is based on being molested as a child myself and having family members blatantly tell me I was a wicked, evil child for even suggesting that my father was that kind of a person, because he was the decon of the church, so of course he must be innocent. No matter than twenty years later he was fired from a volunteer position for sexually harassing teen age girls.
My point about Law & Order and CSI is that even they seem to realize that children abused become stuck in a cycle of violence. Unsure of how to deal with the pain of abuse, the guilt of abuse and the later fears that they might have wanted it, or done something to deserve it they either lead lives trying to hide from the pain via addiction, trying to conquer the pain by doling abuse out to others, or punishing themselves for the actions of AN ADULT WHO KNEW BETTER. Very few people ever manage to come to terms with their abuse and live healthy lives, a tragic statistic that is clear even to the the writers of TV crime shows. So why doesn’t a church of adults seem to see this?
It’s not about leaving him alone with children, it’s about putting him in a role of guide and authority to children. This man is no spiritual adviser, he clearly can’t even keep himself from committing vile, evil acts on defenseless children. Pastors and adults lord over children in the Christan faith, and putting a man who has abused children in the past in this position of authority is disgusting.
That you say he begged to not be allowed around children only reinforces my opinion as a man who desperately puts the responsibility for his own actions on the shoulders of others, and who seems to fear his own actions so much, well this is not a man in control. This is not a man who knows he will not offend again.
As for your asinine assumption that vulgarity equals irresponsibility it clearly shows that your priorities are so misplaced that Madam I fear greatly for YOUR children. Before making assumption on my personal life perhaps you ought to do a little research, because I assure you I have a laundry list of people I could refer you to whose opinion of my parenting is best summed up as “If only more parents were like her”.
Finally, ma’am “illness” only gets a person so far. Alcoholics that kill people in DUIs sill go to jail for it. Addicts who steal, still go to jail for it. Mothers who drown their children because of postpartum depression still go to jail for it. And sex addicts who rape still go to jail for it.
The illness is the psychological and chemical workings of the brain. The CRIME is in acting on it, in this case the evidence I know of suggests that this man that you hold so hallowed anally raped a ten year old boy multiple times because he thought it was his right because he wanted to do. He thought it was his right to violate the mind, the body and the life of this child just because the child was present.
Do not doge the truth of what happened with words like “illness” and by siting bible verses that urge one to forgive sins. The bible says FORGIVE the sinner, not put him in a position of authority over yourself and your children. You would never vote a convicted rapist mayor, or president. Yet in your microcosm of Louisville you have done just that and shame on you.
Well, I would much rather put my faith in someone who has, contrary to the twists of the media, been open about his past than be as irresponsible and neglectful as your parents were and leave my child in the hands of someone whose history or perverse desires I haven’t the first idea about. AGAIN, we at the City of Refuge are more than aware of his past. We believe he deserves a chance. ANYONE who will do as much to prove himself worthy as Mark has deserves a chance. We also believe in this thing called forgiveness and healing. They are two biggies in the Bible that most “Christians” don’t seem to acknowledge. To condemn a person to their past for the rest of their life is small minded. You clearly have NO desire to move on from your scarring, but some folks do. Let them. It’s not affecting you in the least!
The only relevant thing I have no intention of doing is letting what happened to me happen to others as long as I can stop it. That’s I why I wrote the initial letter.
I’m very glad that you are trying to help this man and offering him forgiveness. I just don’t think he should be offered authority. I don’t think you all understand what abuse does to the victims and the victims are the ones who shouldn’t be forgotten in these sorts of situations.
My father was very, very manipulative and had a great number of people fooled into thinking he was just a poor single father who was trying to make it on his own. But to me he was an alcoholic abuser who at best neglected me and at worst…
There is one way I’d would be okay with giving Mark this kind of authority over other people’s lives–if the boy he abused (who is of age now, according to my knowledge) said he approved of it. The only one who knows the full extent of the harm he caused is his victim and the victim’s therapist. If they said they supported it and thought Mark was able to control himself then I’d shut up and let it go.
Shit, I’d still use his ass for target practice. You’re a better person than I, Michele.
Suffering such abuse from a family member is the more common. So much so that the chances are still greater that a child at City of Refuge would be abused by their own father or even mother before they would be by this guy. Mainstream media and TV shows glamorize only a few cases when there are thousands and most are not re-peat offenders. At this point in your own life you are causing your own problems and not your father. Get over it and move on with life. Yes, the memories hurt, but if you dwell on them, you are hurting yourself and not your father.
You’re correct that such abuse from a family friend or family member is more common, and that the media glamorizes these cases. But you idea that myself, and others who have experienced these things should just get over it is ridiculous, in sensitive and idiotic.
This is a process, not something you can just wake up one morning and not be affected by. Coming out in support of other victims, and exposing the truth in an effort to begin a dialog and help others is never, never “dwelling on hurt”. Facing up to what happened rather than hiding in and using my own experiences to try to help others, be it defend them, or face their own problems, is part of the healing processes. This is part of “getting over it” and pretending like it never happened, never mentioning it again and dismissing all the other cases of abuse around is is not healthy at all.
These evil acts persist because of the curtain of silence people insist on drawing around it. I will always welcome this discussion in my life and my corner of the web because the first step to ridding your life of vermin is to expose them in your life.
You are so eloquent Michele, with the ignorance they are replying with I would have been so mad that I would have resorted back to the “such language”.
Unbelievable that people can think that you are “dwelling on hurt”.
Talk about insensitive.
You are an amazing mother, one of the best I’ve ever met. I think your entry was justified and definitely touched on how I felt about the situation.
I love that they can put this man in a position of authority but brow beat you on your opinion.
So typical.
Thank you