10 Ways You Know You’re a Dog Groomer

1. You know how hard it is to dig hair splinters from your nose and between your fingers.

2. You say “I have so many dogs to do today” and “I need to go blow myself off” regularly and don’t giggle about how dirty it sounds.

3. You meet a friend’s pet and immediately start assessing their skin, coat, and nail condition.

4. And think less of them if there is matting or nails need to be clipped. The dog’s, not the people.

5. You begin to assess people in terms like “reactive” and “well trained”.

6. And occasionally stop yourself from telling a person they are a “Good boy/girl”.

7. You especially have to stop yourself from commanding people to “Sit”, “Stay” or “Leave it”.

8. The dogs that make you the most nervous aren’t the big ones or the guard breeds but the little ones who still have their testicles.

9. You can hear “purebred goldendoodle/cockapoo/morkie” and keep a straight face.

10. You will never name a child or a pet of your own “Bailey”, “Lola”, “Layla”, “Charlie”, “Buddy”, “Paisley” or “Jackson”.